• Jamie Jamitkowski

How to Spontaneously Date Your Husband



How to Spontaneously Date Your Husband

“Can we stay over Grandma’s house again tonight?”

It was 9am on a Sunday and I was blissfully (and uncharacteristically) still laying in bed. The previous evening my husband and I had tickets to a play so the kids had had a sleepover with their grandmother. When my phone rang that morning I assumed it would be the boys calling to say they were ready to come home.

I was definitely not expecting them to request another night away.

After making sure that this plan was, in fact, grandmother approved we said our goodbyes and I love yous and hung up the phone. Grandma would drive them home tomorrow some time after lunch. At this point I looked at my husband and said:

“Soooooo…what the hell are we supposed to do with ourselves now?”

In the 10 years since we had children I cannot remember a time when we were confronted with completely free and clear adult time.

Trust me when I tell you we leave our children with babysitters often, being away from our kids is not the problem. We love our kids but we love to leave them sometimes too. We are lucky enough to have plenty of friends and family in the area and we have absolutely no problem hitting them up when we need them. We love to go out, have fun and do adult things so we often have plans. But that’s the thing…for the most part when we leave our kids it’s because we have something to do. An event of some sort. A dinner out, a wedding, concert tickets, etc. Sometimes by ourselves and sometimes with friends. Structured fun with an actual purpose. A beginning and an end.

We enjoy our time away but the thing about leaving our kids with sitters is that there’s a finite time frame. You know at what point you must reclaim them. It’s usually “We’ll be back by 11” or “We’ll pick them up by 9 tomorrow morning cause we have soccer”.

But this? This was different.

Here we were sitting and looking at this stretch of time before us with no scheduled pick up…no rush on getting ready and getting out so as not to miss our reservations…no rules! We were facing 24+ hours of couple time and we were clueless on how to spend it.

Now, clearly, at one time this situation was our norm. We dated and were engaged and married and live together for years before we had kids. But, honestly, I cannot for the life of me remember what it was like. We MUST have stayed in bed all morning some days. We MUST have spontaneously decided to go out to lunch or see a movie or take a drive to the beach. But that was a lifetime ago! Who have I become that a day without any structure makes me freeze and realize:

I DON’T REMEMBER HOW TO HAVE UNSCHEDULED INTERACTIONS WITH MY HUSBAND!!!

Ok, breathe. We can do this. We just have to, like, remember how to date each other. I jokingly said to the hubs “How do we know if we have enough things to say to each other for 24 hours? What if it turns out we don’t even like each other?”

I called my newly engaged cousin and her fiancé to see what young, fun, hip couples do together on a Sunday. They were laying on the couch under a blanket watching reality TV.

Maybe a day of doing nothing wouldn’t be so bad. We sat around the living room for a while but I eventually got antsy and started cleaning. Ok, that wasn’t for us. We would have to leave the house if we didn’t’ want to be distracted by the day to day chores that lived there.

I started getting myself ready. It was weird to do that with no small tyrants barging in to use the bathroom or screaming from other room that they desperately need something done that only mom can help with. I got ready in record time and we were out the door.

We had lunch, went to a cool brewery afterwards, came home and played cornhole in our back yard and then watched a movie. It was rated R and everything!

So, there ya go. I spontaneously dated my husband and it was a great. I know one day the kids will be grown and my husband and I will have plenty of time to spend with just each other. I guess it’s a good thing we got in some practice before that happens!


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