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  • Writer's pictureJamie Jamitkowski

Career or Family – What Does Having the “Perfect” Life Really Mean?

I’ve always been a huge fan of Sex and the City. The show fascinates me. I mean, look at Carrie Bradshaw - she’s a single, 30-something woman with a chic NYC apartment, a prosperous career writing about finding love in the city, and she has a group of friends that are up for dining at fancy restaurants and cocktails at any hour. She makes her own work hours, doesn’t have to answer to anyone, and she can spend all her extra money on way-too-expensive shoes and purses. Doesn’t her life just seem perfect?

Think about that question again.

It does seem perfect, but what happens when perfect becomes boring? What do you do when going to the same bars with the same drinks, the same faces, and the same scenery becomes….mundane? Does there come a time when you decide you would give up your full independence, your lavish lifestyle, your own bank account, and your massive shoe collection to just live a simple, calmer, ordinary life in a small town with a family?

I guess this varies from person to person, and as a 30-something woman myself, I’ve talked to many people my age who ask the same question. I would say the vast majority of the girls I went to high school with are all married, living in new houses or nice apartments with either a couple kids or a baby on the way. A lot of these girls don’t work, and they stay at home caring for their kids all day. I scroll through their photos on Facebook and think oh this is so nice, they must be so happy, but then I stumble across the girls who aren’t tied down, living in big cities with flourishing careers, making more than enough money to support themselves, but they are single. And it’s then that I start to wonder – do these girls ever wish they could trade places with each other? Is perfect just a word we use on social media to give off the perception that we are truly happy with where are in our lives? Would people even be posting 50 photos of their engagement rings, their wedding day, and their babies with food all over their faces if they didn’t want others to think they had such a happy, “perfect” life? Is perfection something we really feel, or is it a standard that social media threatens us to live by?

All I know is this – if you wake up every day and are truly content with where you are in that moment – in your bed, in someone else’s bed, in your apartment, or in the house your rich husband’s family bought for you, in the city or in the small town you grew up in, getting ready to go wait tables, or to put on your $500 suit and win cases in a courtroom, as long as you know you are truly at peace with your life, then to me, that is all you need. Life is short, and if you can find your own version of “perfect” and don’t feel the need to post it on Facebook for daily validation, then I would say you are doing something right.

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